8.22.2010

Those days.

There are days like yesterday... Where I entirely want to shut the world out. Don't want to talk to or see anyone. Just need time to myself; time to be alone; time to think. There's a lot for me to think about. I'd be stupid to deny I'm scared. I'm scared for what the future brings. Then again, I'm also excited. I'm excited to see where life takes me. I just hope I'm strong enough. I've had some moments of weakness. Major moments of weakness. It's hard sometimes, because there are days where I feel entirely alone. Where I haven't heard from any of my friends... except for news I really don't want to hear. Where my family and I get in fights over stupid things like, when I don't have any food to eat. There are days where having a disease has taken it's toll, and I feel like I'd rather be sick than stick to some dumb diet. Those days when you realize going on vacation, only gets you left out of everything.
It's those days where all you're doing is dwelling on the negative. I wish I didn't have those days, but you have to learn how to deal with those days. Because if you don't, it sucks the life out of you. If you don't, it's hard to find happiness,  you just find more excuses to be upset. I'm sorry to say I've been there before. You can judge me all you want, but life gets hard. Sometimes it feels like it's too much to handle, but through experience you learn that God never sends you a trial you can't handle. You can handle any trial you are given. It's whether you choose to handle it that makes the difference. As hard as it may be, I'm here to tell you, that you can handle any trial you are given. What makes it possible is relying on the Lord and those around you who love and care about you. Take the time to see the little things in life that are such a blessing. Some days it's really hard to see those things, but once you do... you become a happier person. Let's be honest, what is wrong with being happy? Nothing. There is nothing wrong with being happy. Don't kid yourself. So go ahead, judge me, judge my blog, judge what I write, but if theres anything you read on my blog read this: God loves you. He only gives us trials because he loves us, and if we help one another out, we can get through them... together.

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